Things I Do & Don't Do

At a MOPS meeting recently, a friend mentioned something she had learned once from a speaker: Make a list of things you do and things you don't do.

I love this idea!  There are so many things that I try to do because I feel pressured to do them - - whether it's pressure from myself, my friends, Pinterest, Facebook, whatever!  But the things I do because I feel pressured to do them get in the way of the things that I want to do that I'm actually good at and want to make a priority!  So here's my list - - or at least a preliminary list.  The things in red are things I am trying to do (or not to do) - - goals.  :)

It is a priority of mine to support and respect my husband.

• I make his lunch whenever I can
• I ask him about his day
• I pray for him throughout the day
• I touch him, and let him touch me
• I look my best when he walks in the door
• I greet him with a smile

...so:

• I don't play with the kids 30 minutes before hubby gets home, to give myself time to get ready for him
• I don't wear provocative clothing (in public), to respect the fact that I am his and his alone
• I don't always clean the dishes after dinner, to make time for us and to have energy for him

It is a priority of mine to be the best mother I can be.

• I make homemade dinners at least 4 times a week
• I teach my kids to pray before meals and before bed
• I pray for my kids and my husband
• I get up when my kids get up
• I keep the house manageably clean
• I prioritize Fridays as family days
• I don't fight with my husband in front of the kids

...so:

• I don't make homemade bread, because I've tried and I'm bad at it
• I don't breastfeed (anymore), because I was giving my boys the worst of myself when I felt tied down with breastfeeding
• I don't swear, because I don't want my boys to
• I don't let just anyone watch my boys, because not everyone has the same values that I do
• I don't listen to whining, because I want my boys to know how to communicate effectively

{This list could be longer - - of things I do and things I don't do - - but I'll stop there, and won't get on my soap box at this time about how I mother my kids.  You're welcome.}

It is a priority of mine to be the best minister I can be.

• I go in to the church early on Sundays
• I pray before starting curriculum
• I work hard on my church duties when I'm at church, and often during nap time at home
• I make an effort to keep in touch with people from church throughout the week
• I pray for my volunteers

...so:

• I don't tell you I'll pray for you when I won't, because prayer is powerful and if you think I'm praying for you it's important that I am
• I don't stay late on Sundays very often, because everyone deserves to get the very best of me and I've been there since 6:30am

It is a priority of mine to make myself a priority. (Yes, I need to work on this one...)

• I get the sunlight I need whenever possible
• I eat at least two meals a day
• I connect with my accountability partner weekly
• I buy myself clothes when I need them
• I rest during nap time
• I get some sort of salon procedure done once a month (i.e. pedicure, waxing, etc.)
• I eat as much chocolate as I want
• I exercise
• I get fresh air
• I spend time alone or with friends, out of the house and away from the kids
• I keep myself clean (spit-up, drool, poop, etc. doesn't stay on me)

...so:

• I don't do most crafts I find on Pinterest, because they frustrate me and take up all my alone time
• I don't do any housework (except laundry) during nap time, to give myself time to relax
• I don't run very many errands with the boys, because it exhausts me and so I have things to do outside the house after hubby gets home

That's all I can think of right now!  These ideas have been brewing in my head for a while now, so it's nice to get them down on "paper."  Thanks for reading!

Lessons from 2013

About a year ago (at the turn of 2013), I posted what I had learned over the course of 2011-2012.  I was looking back on my posts from last January, just to see where I was a year ago.  It was so interesting to read about the lessons God had taught me in that time, which now seems so long ago.  My post from January 2013 made me want to write a similar one for this year: What I learned in 2013.

As I look back on my year, there is one theme that stands out in my mind: Community.  I have posted about this before, but it really was such a prevalent theme in my year, that it deserves a deeper look.

God has revealed to me three specific aspects of community in 2013 that I really don't want to forget.  The first is The Importance of Community.  If I were to be completely honest with myself (and those of you reading this post), I spend most of 2012 being lonely.  In fact, I have spend most of my life feeling lonely.  The longevity of my loneliness is probably the reason why I never really thought that there was anything else.  The importance of community never dawned on me until I truly experienced it.  When we moved to our current hometown, I was a little worried that we were moving further from family, but I was so excited to be near our church.  Even before we were here, God gave me a sense of peace that we would find new and long-lasting relationships when living closer to our church family.  That's exactly what our church became for us once we moved here: a family.  I can't imagine going back to the way things were before we were here.  Even on days when I don't see or talk to anyone but my kids and husband, I know that I have a support system here.  I know that there are people who genuinely care about me and who are really praying for me.

Photo taken by Kelley

That leads me to the second thing I learned in 2013: The Meaning of Having a Community.  It is one thing to go through the motions of church and not really get connected; it is something entirely different to experience the fellowship that church was designed to be, and to develop lasting relationships that make a difference in your life.  For me, having a community means that there are people whom I can ask for help (even though I'm not always good at that... I'm working on it!) when I'm in a tough spot.  It means that when I need prayer, there are people ready and so willing to pray for me.  Having a community means there are people to get out of the house with (or who will happily babysit my kids for me) when I get stir-crazy.  I have a support system that I know God is using to make me a better person.  Having a community sometimes means there will be people who call me out when I'm out of line.  They'll whip me back into shape so that I am being the best Elizabeth that I can be.  I am so grateful to have support systems in the forms of my small group, my accountability partner (which is someone I just paired up with this year - - and it's one of the best things I did in 2013!), the ministry I am part of at church, my neighbors, Facebook groups, MOPS, fellow staff members, and my family.


Photo taken by Tim



Photo from Jan's camera



Photo taken by Mark



Photo taken by Greg

The Meaning and Importance of Being Part of a Community is the third lesson that stands out to me from 2013.  I confess I am still working on this one (though, if I'm honest, I'm still working on all of these points).  As a part of the community, I have a responsibility to my friends.  It's not an obligation, though - - it's something I want to do as a member of the community.  I want to talk on the phone with these people, I want to help them take care of their kids, laugh with them, and lift them up in prayer.  I want to be by their side when they are hurting, and at their kids' birthday parties.  It is so meaningful to not only have the support system in place for myself, but to actually be that person for someone else!  I've been that person for people in the past, sure - - but never in the context of community like I've felt this past year.  It is for this reason that I am so grateful for these lessons that the Lord has taught me this year.

To those of you through whom God has taught me these lessons this year, thank you from the bottom of my heart!  Thank you for being my truest friends, and for sticking by me closer than a brother.

The Smaller Things

I've decided to stop stressing about what I accomplish during the day, and start enjoying the smaller things... because really, the smaller things are not small at all!

Today's accomplishments: I trimmed both the boys' nails, did one load of dishes, and cleaned up all of the toys in the house at the end of the day.  I also swept and mopped the downstairs quickly while waiting for our pizza to be delivered (yes, that's right - - I didn't even make dinner!!).

Today's joys: I snuggled with the Peanut, had lunch with the Love Bug, we went shopping with very few tears, I bought a new purse, and almost every time my son asked to sit in my lap, I was able to say yes!  I got some work done for church (which I consider pure joy).  I even got some quality time with my husband before he was called in to work today (last day of being on call, and he gets a three day weekend)!

I'm glad today's joys outweighed the accomplishments, because finding joy in what you do is so much more important than finishing tasks.

"The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy!" ~ Psalm 126:3

Gotta love nap time!

Easter Gifts for Childcare Workers

At my church, the nursery is almost always open - - something I am very grateful for, as the mother of a 14-month-old who loves to move around and talk (loudly) during service.

I wanted to give the nursery workers a small gift of appreciation for their dedication to helping young families like ours enjoy the services on Easter.  I have no money, and I am not very crafty.  This is what I came up with (and I'm a little proud of them!).

 

 

Cookies in baggies - - cost me no money because I had all the ingredients on hand... and the baggies as well.  I was tempted to run to the store and grab some (off-budget) cuter bags, but I resisted.

 

Those little flowers I have had in my crafting box for a long time now.  Same with the cardstock.

 

What are you doing for the childcare workers at your church this Easter?  Did this post inspire you?  Leave me some love!